Are you the kind of friend who cares about your beloveds? Who listens to them when they need to talk, let them use your shoulder when they need to cry, just as well being their source of energy when they need to laugh? That friend who wants everybody to be happy (even if you know it’s not possible), and who wants to be there for each and everyone of them?
I think it’s wonderful that you want the best for the people around you. Though if you recognize yourself as one of these friends, I guess you’re aware of it being rather tricky at times. This is how I experience it:
I want to be a good friend (of course). I like being nice and I enjoy being appreciated. And honestly, being nice is not particularly difficult! The thing is that the nicer you want to be, the more people you’ll see, and the more people you talk to the more problems they’ll share with you. Suddenly you realize you can’t do anything about any of these issues. You’re sad because they suffer from it, and you’re not only feeling for one of these individuals, but for every single one that has told you about their sucky life. Now you feel like you’re carrying a backpack filled with bricks up the Mount Everest, sorta. – But it’s not a backpack; it’s your heart.
Gold is pretty, Beautifuls, but boy, is it heavy! Actually, it has got a density of 19,3 grams per square centimeters! And your heart has got the size of a fist… Now imagine carrying around a heart of gold everywhere you go. No wonder you feel down sometimes!
Having a heart of gold is no bed of roses. It might as well drag you down to the ground, especially if you keep letting it do so! But you’re not stupid, Beautifuls. You know what you need to do if you wanna lift something heavy? You gotta train your strenght!
“Um… really? I’m gonna work out so that I can be strong enough to carry an imaginary golden heart?” Well, you could try! What I’m thinking is that you need to work at understanding what is reasonable for you to bear. Start up easily, and then go on to more if you feel like you could handle that. But you can’t be everywhere, even if you’d want to! Whenever it feels as if you’re hitting the ground it’s time to stop and start thinking of yourself. It’s not likely for you to put your friends first and yourself second, third or eleventh!
Trust me, you’re not a bad friend if you put yourself first. If somebody’d think you are, they are not worth one more second of your time! You would never be able to be as supportive as they’d need you to be if you’d be at the same mental place as they are. None of us really want to be miserable, so avoid becoming so when you can. Don’t load your heart with more weight than you could bear! 💛
Be good to each other – but also to yourselves,