There are a few things in this world that I think is rather given, unwritten facts, so to say. These could be for instance “don’t kill people”, “we all are equal on this planet” and so on, but also “don’t judge a person from what others say – make your own judgement”. I’d say I’m pretty good at that. I don’t care about what other people say about a person, I care about my own impression of him/her! – And my nose just grew three inches.
There is this guy at work. He is real nice and talks with everyone, actually a typical nice person! I liked him a lot. Liked. Until I heard my co-workers arguing that he is SO SLOW WHEN TALKING and the fact that it’s SO ANNOYING. I didn’t think he was slow. Of course I couldn’t just forget about what I’d heard the next time I saw him, I had to listen for the slow-talking! Wait. Yep, there it was. They were right, it is annoying.
And so they had me changing my mind. Naturally I didn’t think of it at first, but then I realized that I had gone from thinking him being nice to him being annoying. “Well observed” – I know, but crazy enough we appear to see much less than we want to believe sometimes, at least I know I do.
It was the same thing with this girl in High School. It was a new city to me and I didn’t know anybody, so I had to get to know my classmates to see what kind of people they were. Of course I didn’t connect with everybody, but most of them were nice anyways. The first months I hung out with quite different people, one of them being this girl, that I also thought was pretty okay.
The more weeks passed, the more people started talking about her, though. Sure, I had noticed she was a bit special from the rest of the students, having a differing temperament due to the ADHD and the ability to say less suitable things to people, but didn’t they understand that it wasn’t her intention to insult anybody? Apparently not. People sorta started to back off, focusing on their own friends. It’s not like they treated her childishly or anything, only they didn’t hang out with her unless the were obliged to. The tension was in the air every time she was around, and in time it had affected me as well. I was no better than the rest of them.
Isn’t that funny? I tell myself I’m such a good person and that at least I know how to make an own judgement, yet I stand there, listening to what others think. But don’t come and tell me I’m alone with that. If you can say that you don’t care about others opinions, that’s great. However, then you’d better make sure that you’re not exactly like me. Because I for real thought that I could say the same. I was wrong.
Beautifuls, maybe we could work on this together? To try real hard to remember not to let us be affected by what other people say. If we won’t judge the book by it’s cover, we won’t judge a person by others opinions! Deal? Great. ♥︎
Have a nice day!